Posted on Friday, September 14, 2012 by LaurenJoan
Over the bounding main,
For many a stormy wind shall blow
Ere Alice and Joanie B. come home again!
Laurenjoan: In Part 1 of our (mis)adventures in New York City - Alice and Joanie B. set sail (walked from the subway station) to their cabin bunks at The Jane Hotel, former home to sailors lost in the city between ships...
Take a time warp-step into The Jane Hotel, 113 Jane Street, New York, NY. ..adjacent to the Hudson River, the Meatpacking District and walking distance to Chelsea, Soho, and Union Square....
The Jane: Our Bunk Bed Cabins, at a cozy 50 sq. ft., can accommodate 2 travelers... Please note: All Bunk Bed Cabins share the communal bathrooms located at the end of the hall on each floor.
(uh-oh) Joanie B. thought..shared bathrooms, bunkbeds...and...
...Monkeys and peacocks and mooseheads - oh my!
Laurenjoan: Alice and Joanie B should have checked on the internet for reviews of The Jane Hotel, like this one: "When they say shared bath, they mean shared with a multitude.
or this review of the bunk rooms
"... so I knew our bunk room would be tiny...There is barely room to turn around."
Laurenjoan: Oh well, I guess some chickens have to learn by the school of hard sqawks. Let's see how they deal with The Jane Hotel situation...
Alice: Did you see all those stiff animals in the lobby - the moosehead? the monkey? and the peacock? What kind of place is this?
Joanie B. pecked the elevator button for the 4th floor. The door slammed shut. Ding, ding, ding - swoosh. The girls came out onto a narrow dark alley-like hallway.
Joanie B: 431 - this is it?
Joanie B. stepped into the room and Alice bumped into her.
Alice: Move over Joanie B. - I'm barely in.
Joanie B: I can't - this is as far as I can go.
Her face was smashed against the window. She wiggled around and hopped onto the bottom bunk.
Joanie B: I'm boss so I get the bottom bunk.
Alice jumped from her suitcast to the bunk ladder, then up to the top bunk. She immediately pecked the buttons on the air-conditioning unit - and got blasted by - warm air.
Alice: Its hot up here and I need to go to the little hens' room.
Alice made her way up the dark alley, I mean hallway, by feeling her way there. Once she got to the bathroom, it looked kinda cute - and there was a sweet view from the window of the Hudson River.
Alice looked out the window, felt the (slightly) cool breezed coming through, then turned around and saw --
Whaawk? Alice said to herself and blushed, feeling very uncomfortable. She had only ever shared a coop with other hens. The bathroom had strange men (and women) coming now in multitudes, there were stiff animals in the lobby - as Alice remembered they were near the Meatpacking district - and their coop was teeny tiny and hot.
Alice realized that she was now a nervous wreck of a chicken! How was she going to appear as a professional blogger of Chicken Fashion Nation at the Independent Fashion Bloggers conference?!?!
Alice flapped, hopped, flew back to Room 431 and burst into the (teeny, tiny) room.
Alice: Braaawwk! We need to get out of here. I need my privacy. I need space to turn around in. I need air! We're too cooped up in this coop! We gotta get outta here!
Joanie B. was lounging on her bunk (the bottom, one of course). There was a bit of cool-ish air flowing. She was pecking on her Ipad.
Joanie B: I'll search on Kayaakkkkk..
Laurenjoan: Several hours and countless searches later - she found a real hotel with a real private bath for a really good price (for New York City) - the Hotel Pennsylvania...uh oh...maybe she should have taken a look at Yahoo's Trip Advisor before she booked the room at the Hotel Translvania - I mean Hotel Pennsylvania...
End of Part 2 --
Laurenjoan: Alice and Joanie B.'s Sailor dreams are over...turn in next time for the continuing (mis)adventures that await them as they make their professional chicken blogger debute...In the meantime, if you ever travel to New York City, you might want to check out these books and websites before you make a hotel reservation: